drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize