oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
