I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
