Kareoke will never be a sober sport
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
She even gives head with a lisp.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
