I heard we made out
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
