she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Green mimosas i think yes
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
