found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
