dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Randomize
