yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
