SEEEEXXX PLEASE
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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