The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
