Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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