Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something

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(619): View more from California

Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Are you still goin to the xmas party?

(1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Yaaaa why?

(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .

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(620): View more from Kansas

He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.

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(312): View more from Illinois

My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am

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(770): View more from Georgia

I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich

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