David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize