True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
