he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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