we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
