I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
