I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
