Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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