Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Success! We fucked roommates!
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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