Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Randomize
