Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
