I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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