Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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