butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
