I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
