Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
