I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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