Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Randomize
