fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
