his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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