Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
