I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
