I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
