i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
