I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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