So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
