party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
