I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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