Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Even my vagina gasped.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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