I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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