I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize