David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
