i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
