1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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