Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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