To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
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