Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
okay pat passed out under dana's car
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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