these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
