ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
