I CAN MOONWALK!
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
